NOTICE TO ALL RESIDENTS
Re: Scheduled opening of one (1) can of fermented Baltic herring
On the third Thursday of August, the undersigned will open the above in the garden, punctured while immersed in a bucket of water. The date is the traditional surströmming premiere.
Wikipedia says this is how the can is often punctured, so that the escaping gas does not spray brine. The undersigned considers it the minimum.
A single can, for personal use.
This notice is posted seven days ahead. The undersigned would like credit for the lead time.
Residents are asked to close their windows. Complaints may be addressed to the can.
Tolerance used: 5%. Well inside. Comfortably within what a fellow tenant can be expected to tolerate. Expect a polite nod and a closed window.
Signed, the undersigned (a tenant in good standing, pending the above)